i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize