I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
