We're like a lot better than the average bears
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize
