weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
