He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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