Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
no you cant smoke seaweed
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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