you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
