Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
