He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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