oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
