I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
