And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
