Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
this just has baby written all over it
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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