Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Randomize