Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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