I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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