four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize