Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
