You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
