Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Randomize