I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
