people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize