I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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