marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
