I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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