every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
false alarm, still single
Randomize
