I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize