Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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