whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
