"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
