...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
