It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
