Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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