is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I think my fart just growled at me.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize