My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
