I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Well I just put wine in my tea
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
