great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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