ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
