Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
His hands were made for my vagina.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
