Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
it was like eating out sand paper
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
My breasts were aching with rage.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Randomize
