Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
