I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
