Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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