She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize