If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
is it fun? or sober?
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
