goodnight i made you a song goodbye
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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