I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
