Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
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