Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
