i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Houston, we have a squirter
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I think my nap took me to another dimension
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
