when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
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