Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Two words: blizzard sex
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
